What a relaxing weekend I've had. Yesterday Troy had a 1000 football game; I slept in and then we went to the game. His team lost, but they had a great game. Afterward, it was sunny out and the craving for the woods came on quite strong. I and Topaz went out to the trail. We walked 5 miles, I felt tired but it was good to stretch out my legs and actually move a bit. I was finally able to get my shoes over my feet; the swelling and blistering has gone down quite a bit.
The rest of the afternoon I just hung out at home. I helped Steve stain the deck..a very little bit..and moved some black dirt around for my perennial garden. I still haven't finished up that project. I printed off Sheila's stretching routine and stretched for 20 minutes.
I finally unpacked my drop bags from the race. I didn't want to feel the hope that I had while packing them, I didn't want to go there again. After talking with Maria, that's where I went, to unpack them and unload those emotions. It was good and it was good to move on.
This morning I awoke early, my body must have finally had enough rest. I pulled on my running shorts and filled up a few bottles. I and Topaz went to the trail. And I ran. It felt so good. I smiled and laughed and was happy to be out there. Rain and all. It was glorious. I talked to God and thanked him for allowing me to run Superior as far as I did and was grateful that I wasn't injured and that I felt like myself again. I ran 5 miles and then walked 3.
Mid week I told the boys we were going to go to Church this Sunday. I just am not much into Church; I have never made it a priority. I was raised Catholic, married in a Catholic Church and had both boys baptized and made their first communions in our Catholic Church. But the last few years I have disagreed with the Catholic ministry. I don't believe that women shouldn't be able to minister and I don't believe that minister's should have to be celibate. Those are only a few disagreements I have with the Catholic religion.
Last year Tyler went to the Riverside Alliance Church, because a few of his very good friends attend there and enjoyed the youth program. When I saw how excited he was over it (he even went to a church youth camp) I decided I and Troy would come along to Church as well. I went for a few weeks, enjoyed the Church very much, was a bit surprised at how different in was from the Catholic Church, but enjoyed the change. Then I became busy with other things (running Sunday's) and just let it go.
Today we attended and I found it a wonderful experience, again. It was interesting. The Pastor was speaking about being 'mournful'. He stated that to "mourn" means that we stop trying to cover up our messes, our guilt and our pain on the inside. He asked us to bring our pain to the outside, to acknowledge it and to be real. To be real about what is going on in our lives, to let people know how we feel and to know of the mess we feel inside, that to feel this openness and this mournfulness is a blessing.
He stated that we will experience God's love, comfort and grace when we are real about our hurts, our pain and our discouragement inside.
Isn't that awesome? That is JUST what I have been doing!